It was not long ago I wrote a blog about how nice guys do not always finish last. This is still true. However, I can tell you the bad boys rarely, if ever finish last compared to the nice guys. More often they finish first! There is something about taking that risk with a bad boy that is highly sexy and attractive to many females. The bad boy has a charm and confidence about him that speaks volumes and distracts us women from the truth of what we are getting ourselves into. In all fairness to the men, we are all grown up women who take full responsibility for taking on the bad boys and all of the fallout and heartbreak that comes with it.
Women ignore the giant red flags waving and slapping us in our faces. We also make excuses in our minds for these bad boys and their behavior. We just cannot resist the temptation from these bad boys. It is almost like when you are in a dream and you wake and feel paralyzed for a moment and cannot move but you are fully aware of your surroundings and your body. You know the inherent dangers but you just do not care! That animalistic magnetic quality combined with his alluring way he projects himself onto you is a battle you just can not win with yourself. We throw in the white flag and follow his lead no matter where that may take us!
Recently I found myself in an encounter with one of the top bad boys of all time that I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. We met at a marina and as I watched him pull up in his big black pickup truck I first noticed the pretty young girl driving his truck who I knew was like a daughter to him and sweet as can be. The second thing I noticed was this country cowboy with his black cowboy hat, button up blue jean sleeveless shirt holding a beer in one hand and a cigarette in the other! My feet were firmly planted as if in quicksand, although I had a quick passing thought of getting into my car and leaving. I emphasize “quick” because that thought came and went so fast it really did not register! Under normal circumstances, I would run from a man like this. In the past, I have been so picky about the man I dated I would be turned off if he chewed with his mouth open. But here I was, face to face with one of the most handsome, sexiest bad boys I had ever met. This backwoods country boy has a thick country accent, eyes, and a smile to melt your heart where you stood! I knew I was in trouble at that very moment and every moment thereafter but I was frozen in time and enjoyed every moment with this new man who would soon become my bad boy! Well, as long as one can hold down the ultimate bad boy.
This backwoods country boy has a thick country accent, eyes, and a smile to melt your heart where you stood!
We took a walk down by the bay and took a seat on the bench by the water together. It was a hot and balmy evening that never allowed you to forget you were in the south. I was immediately attracted physically to this man and mesmerized by the way he spoke and the tone of his voice was hypnotizing. He made it known he felt the same things I was feeling which of course just sealed the deal and our fate. This cowboy, AKA Bad Boy, proceeded to tell me right off about his past including four past marriages, not including the mother of his grown son whom he never married. We both had suffered great losses that few can understand and this was something that added to both of our thoughts that we were brought together for a special reason. Again, here I was justifying why the risk with this bad boy was worth it.
In the majority of the bad boy’s women encounter it is our sense of his goodness and possibilities that with the right woman this bad boy can be tamed. Everyone wants to be loved for who we are and not to be changed or taken on as a ‘fixer upper’ kind of project. However, let us be honest here ladies. We always have it in our minds that we can be the one to break through these tough barriers and rough exteriors. We are the one who can make a difference and bring out the best in even the roughest of bad boys. I knew what I had to offer and truly felt I could add to this bad boy’s life in ways, not any other woman had before. My first mistake of many! The night continued on but time seemed to stand still as we drank some and danced the night away to live music on the deck at the marina, the dock and later at his home on his front porch. He sang country songs to me as we danced one song after the other kissing through every song as if we were the only two people present. We were like a brightly lit sun and moon dancing together as the evening faded into the morning. The chemistry and passion was one many dreams of but never have the chance to experience. There was something different and special in this bad boy I found simple and good. Something I could see in him that he could not even see in himself.
Our journey together lasted exactly 2 weeks. We were lost in our own defined love and inseparable except when my bad boy had to be at work. In time he let it be known he enjoyed and did not have intentions of changing his bad boy behavior. He expressed many times to me he wanted to improve his life and exactly what he needed to do so. He needed a “good woman” beside him as a lover and best friend and I knew I was just the woman to do this for him because he confirmed this for me. The truth is you cannot change anyone, man or woman, and especially not a bad boy. I could see in him what he could not see in himself, all the possibilities, the hurts of the past and present, and the goodness in all of the badness. However, until he sees this in himself he will continue on in all of his backwood country bad boy ways and the next woman in line will take in the pleasure and pain as she endures the same heartbreaking battle I fought and lost but will never regret or forget.